Lights on Me

Just went up to Doulos wiv Mum, Paul and Kenny. The last time I went was around 15 year ago. But there weren't Mum, Paul or even Kenny. I was there with Leonard and Dad. Suddenly i missed the old times so much where Dad and Leonard is still around at home. Things have changed alot. Same ship, different companions, different feelings. Life has come a long way for me, and perhaps for everyone that i know. If only I can turned back time, I'll appreciate more all the times that we had, late night's chat, joking around and poking fun at each other . But again, that's human being's weakness--always take things for granted. You wouldn't realized how important a person in your life, or how fortunate to have experienced some things, until you lose it all. I've decided to go abroad. All the tests, the procedures, everything... sigh... it's a long way to go. I'm currently waiting excitingly for the coming school holidays, because that's the only time that I...

Life is about choices.. Choices about how you want to run your life, what principles that you hold, what career you are heading in the future. Perhaps, now is a time where tough choices are ahead for me. Both family and friends have their own saying about what is the best. So, what's the best for me? I'm easily influenced by persuasion, and i usually give in easily. Sometimes ever so reluctantly, i followed what people asked or wanted me to do. I do not have much consideration of what I want in the first place. For this, I've been wasting more than a year now, which could easily turned out to be an interesting year for me to proceed to my dreams. A year of frustration, a year of uncertainty, and a year of lost chances. The 6 months in Melaka wasn't the best in my life. Some might say it's just a short period in your life. But in reality, I've lost alot of chances in this 6 months time. Work, study, career, even my relationship. Every person in my life has their ...

I was really surprised how young kids at the age of 7 & 8 lied and giving excuses for not handing in their homework. 3 kids today gave me unreasonable and of course unbelievable excuses. Case 1: "I have the book. But when i went to buy drinks in the canteen, someone took my book from my bag. After I go back home to finished the exercise, I couldn't find it.... even my Mum couldn't find it. Really!" "emm hm....?" "But just now, when i reached the class, I found the book in my bag. I dunno how it get there, but i'm really sure that it wasn't there yesterday. Really.." "so...?" "Erm... that's why i didn't finish the exercise, cause it's just not enough time for me to finished it." she said with the sweetest smile u can ever imagine. " Can I call your mum now?" In the shortest moment, the cute little girl burst into tears. There goes the far from perfect lie.. Case 2: " My mum brought me to...

Given the person in me a few months back this question, "What do you want for your birthday?", my answer might sounded something like this, "It's OK. You don't have to give me anything." Yeah rite.. I'm always conscious of not putting others into trouble to get me something and not receiving from anyone, if I wasn't desperate enough. Perhaps I'm more comfortable as a giver, rather a receiver. There's a tiny voice in me that keep reminding me that being a giver is better than receiving. Maybe it's the moral values that I'm holding on so rigidly all these years. Jules and Sandz told me before that I needed to love myself more. I couldn't understand that actually. I felt happy when people who received from me were happy. It's the act of giving that made me feel happy, or honestly, it made me felt that I'm a good person. And I never think that I deserved anything from anyone. A really troubling side of me huh? Today, when I w...